Figleaf Saturday!

27 Apr

It’s been building a while, did you know
That Rob’s on the X Factor show
This Saturday night?
So stay in and sit tight
Oh this week is sure going to be slow!
I think all Rob’s friends will be there
To watch him and drool and to stare
At the birds on his tum
And his too sexy bum
Oh I do wonder what he will wear?

At last it is here, Saturday!
Oh husband and kids, go away
I want it to be
Just my Robbie and me
That alright Rob, hey what do you say?
Did you watch the wee clip on the blog?
It’s so cool, oh and did you see Rob?
How good does he look?
By hook or by crook
My friend Robbie can make my heart throb!
Oh god, look at that, Robbie’s bum
I love it, I want it, yum yum
He’s looking fantastic
Rob be my gymnastic
Lover, oh please give me some!
I want him, I need him, I do
He is mine, so girls please join the queue
I’m dying to see
What he could do to me
And I won’t stop ’til my dream comes true!
At last, there it is, Rob’s fig leaf!
Is this our wee aperitif?
Come on show us your stuff
Let’s see you in the buff
Ah c’mon, show a bit of your beef!
The fig leaf, the fig leaf, my god
What a beaut, I’ve become the Vice Squad
And I must scrutinise
What behind that leaf lies
Oh a sausage and two peas in a pod!
That tan and that bod, what a treat
My Saturday night is complete
It was well worth the wait
And the rise in heart rate
Everything else will now feel obsolete.
Rob will you be back? Please say yes…
‘Cos if not, I will sure be a mess
We all miss you so much
So Rob please get in touch
And I know it will help ease my stress!
Well now I must go, what a pity
It’s been fun writing this little ditty
I’ll come back here soon
With my signature tune
And I promise to make it more witty!
Before I go Rob, can I ask
Just when you will come to Belfast?
I so need you here
And I’ll buy you a beer
And I swear to you, we’ll have a blast.
Well friendlies good night one and all
It’s been fun but I’ve hit my brick wall
I can hardly believe
Rob and his figleaf!
It was fun, didn’t we all have a ball?

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